Part 2 is much shorter than part 1! (I think. We'll see if I can tame my wordy-ness!) Especially since I have to make breakfast and I'm majorly procrastinating since the boys are playing so nicely. (For now...)
Part 2 takes place at Disneyland, after the big Fantasmic show. My family had split up during the show... I wanted Jake to finish watching the show because he didn't get to see Mickey Mouse all day, and he had been talking about it for the 3 days prior. So my two nieces, myself, and Jake stayed to watch the remainder of the show. The rest of my family took Austin and got a head-start to their final ride.
So after the show, you know the mayhem that follows. The streets are crowded with throngs of people, literally shoulder-to-shoulder, all being herded one way or the other. Jake was on my niece, Alyssa's, shoulders. We were all-three in a line, hanging onto each other's hands or shirts or whatever we could, so we wouldn't get separated.
Jake turned around and was saying he needs water, so I was holding his hand (as he was on Alyssa's shoulders), and telling him that his sippy cup is in the stroller and we would get there soon.
When all of the sudden the woman behind us jams her stroller between me and Alyssa. I'm still holding Jake's hand and he's leaning towards me. I tried to walk around the front of her stroller tire (so my son doesn't fall off my niece's shoulders, hello! We're obviously together!), and she jams her stroller farther forward. She says loudly to her husband, "I'm just going to push my way through. I'm just going to GO!"
My face got hot as I struggled to find words, once again, appropriate words.
"I can't be separated from my children!!!" I say adamantly, looking at her but not into her face. (Why? Fear of confrontation maybe?)
She moves her stroller forward again and I'm holding Jake's hand and look from him to her again, speechless, so I repeat the same thing with more emphasis, "I can-NOT be separated from my children!"
Oh, so many things would have been more appropriate! What the heck was she thinking? She has a child, safe in her little stroller. Would she allow some pushy woman to come between herself and her child in this endless ocean of people?
So I turned my back, stepped over the front of her tire, continued to hold Jake's hand with one hand and Alyssa's with the other. "Hold onto Mariah, stay together!" I said.
And here's when the ridiculousness began. (You like my word? It must actually be a real word, because spell check didn't catch it. Woo hoo!)
This woman began to push her stroller into my heels with every step I took. Not hard, not enough to hurt, but it's still NEVER okay.
The first 2 or 3 nudges, I ignored. I know how it is to push a stroller in a crowd, being bumped and cut-off every second. I thought maybe it was an accident. But with every step as I felt her stroller land again against my heels again, I realized she was doing this on purpose.
I was speechless, face still hot. Words wouldn't come, they just wouldn't! I figured what probably happened is that my niece cut her off, I'm sure of it, because she was rather in a hurry to get to the ride. But I also figured that this woman was a grown-up, and a MOM, and she should be able to control herself. Still, the words wouldn't come. I could only muster numerous backward glares at the woman, (with each step), but she avoided my face of course and continued to push onward.
I told my niece what she was doing, loudly, using my hands to demonstrate the stroller hitting the backs of my legs, which was followed by our 3 evil glances back at her. My sweet niece moves to go around me, saying, "Auntie, let me walk behind you." "NO!", and I look back at the woman with the only words I could think to say, "That is NOT necessary!"
Ooooh, soooo confrontational! So impressive and self-assured I am!
We made a quick left turn to get away from the jerk, and as we weaved through all the nice, normal people, I simmered in the frustration with 1) myself for not telling this woman just HOW out of line she was being, and 2) this woman who thinks it's okay to do such a thing.
Twice in one week I had confrontations with bullies. And twice in one week, I left feeling regretful that I didn't say more. Come to think of it, I have only confronted a bully once. It was hard, and I cried both before and after. But it felt good, and I gained her respect. (And got a piece of my own back!) It was actually a doctor and it was 4 years ago. But for the most part, I have spent my whole life avoiding confrontation at all cost.
The thing is, I understand the frustration of strollers in crowds. You hardly make any headway because everyone goes in front of you. And I understand being upset. My niece did admit that she jammed her foot in front of her stroller so we could get through.
BUT, there is just no excuse for her behavior. Using words is one thing. It's the adult thing, the appropriate thing. I would have apologized for my niece and it would have been over. Maybe she has always been that bully, that ring-leader. Maybe she had a hard day and was beside herself. I hope her husband saw what she was doing, and I hope he told her how wrong she was. Because I certainly didn't.
Next time I encounter a bully, you will hear a much more empowering story, I promise!
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